Tuesday, July 13, 2010



"Supplemental Poemski" is

The title of the post

Closing the Polanski Show,

Where I have been the host

For five full years, in hopes that you

Might find it entertaining,

While against the standard blogging

SHIT I went campaigning.


Those o' you who know me know

My work is hardly done.

Wherever there is POEMIN' and

Wherever there is FUN,

THERE I'll be in spirit, and

Might even be in FACT;

BUT, from this day forward,

The Polanski Show is JACKd.

  1. FINAL POEMSKI:  Here youll find 2 poemskis from Polanski, 7 from Atlas, and 1 from th Revrend Anaglyph.  Skip th post and just read TH COMMENTS.
  2. Th Wait:  Here youll find 6 poemskis from Polanski, 2 from Atlas, and 1 from one othr.  Th post is calld Sit Tight.
  3. Th Doc:  Here youll find 9 poemskis from Polanski and 15 from Atlas.  Th post is calld TRIBUTE -- Dr. Robert J. Murk.
  4. Mo' PFOs:  Here youll find 4 new poemskis from Polanski and 2 from Atlas.  Th new ones start HERE.
  5. Your Homunckulette:  Here youll find 3 poemskis from Polanski and 6 from Atlas.  Th post is calld You and Your Homunckulette (a Exspurts Guide).
  6. Laff Lines:  Here youll find 2 poemski from Polanski and 2 from Atlas.  Th post is calld One Liner.
  7. Past It:  Here youll find 1 poemski from Polanski and 1 from Atlas.  Th post is calld Let's party like it's 1999.
  8. Sambo:  Here youll find 1 poemski from Polanski and 1 from Atlas.  Th post is calld Please Dont Confuse Em.
  9. HOs:  Here youll find 4 poemskis from Polanski and 16 from Atlas.  Th post is calld meet market.
  • 32 Polanski poemskis
  • 54 Othr poemskis
  • 86 Totl poemskis
  • 9 Posts
  • 3 Blogskis
    • The Joey Polanski Show (5)
    • Old Fish and Lemonade (2)
    • Tetherd Cow Ahead (2)
  • 4 Poemrs
    • Joey Polanski (32)
    • Atlas Cerise (52)
    • Anaglyph (1)
    • 1 othr (1)

PLUS, youll find 28 "fugitive poemskis" ovr at Joey's Hole.

-- Joe No Mo'

TRIBUTE -- Atlas Cerise


And what is there to say, by way o payin SPECIAL TRIBUTE, about Atlas Cerise?  I mean, once yall seen I was doin a stretch-run series o TRIBUTE postskis to close out th Show, did any o yas have ANY doubt as to WHO woud get the final honor in that series?

Each one o th bloggrs I done payd tribute to awready has a special place in JPS histry and a special place in my affecktion.  Each IS special, and uniquely so.  And surely th suprlatives were flyin when I payd tribute to th Revrend Anaglyph and Tetherd Cow Ahead.  But rathr early on in my bloggin career, Atlas began to exibit a style o play -- head down, balls out, bull-in-a-china-shop, ballistick -- that is such a embodyment o th Polanski Show ideal that sompm happmd that Im guessin almost NEVR HAPPMS in th blogassfear.  A TWO-MAN ACKT emerged.  ATLAS + POLANSKI = ATLANSKI.

You long-time and CAREFUL readrs o th JPS probly know that The Polanski Show PROPR originatd in 1975 as a two-man ackt.  It was me & my brothr, Piet.  Piet Polanski.  The Polanski Show WAS th Brothrs Polanski.  And th oprative principple bhind The Polanski Show was what was latr adoptd as th original motto o The Joey Polanski Show here in th blogassfear.  Anybody remembr what it was?  Yep ...  as long as it's funny!

A Brittish flossifr namd Bradley once suggestd that a dog's supreme metaphysickle principple is sompm like: "Whatevr IS smells; and whatevr smells not IS NOT."  Similarly, th principple o The Polanski Show sorta DEFIND Polanski reality.  If it's FUNNY, its werfwhile; and if it AINT funny, then WHY BOTHR?  Ocourse, th principple was acktive long bfore me & Piet evr consciously idennifyd it; and our adherence to th principple (along wit th fackt that me & Piet shared th same sense o humor) prduced a fearless mixture o competition, coopration, and mutual admiration that made fer th appearance of a carefully honed ackt, evn tho it was, by our own insistence, almost wholly off-th-cuffski.

You long-time careful readrs also no doubt recall that The Joey Polanski Show was startd largely as a private joke that might somday be discoverd by Piet in his travels thru cybrspace.  It was then quickly dvelopd inta sompm more -- sompm a bit more fer genral consumption, sompm intended to be interacktive.  And, soon enough, along came Doc Murk.  And then Tomski.  And then th Revrend and th whole Tetherd Cow explosion -- Cissy Strutt, Anne Arkham, Mike, and Atlas (then known as JediMacFan).

And you especialy dedickatd readrs woud know also that, so far as I know, Piet has nevr chancd upon The Joey Polanski Show.  I mean, if he has, then he has NOT let me KNOW that he has.  And thus I can say, as I am on th verge o publishing th final JPS post, that thru th entire run o th Show there has been, to my knowledge, a unbreachd separation o th life o Polanski in cybrspace from th life o th Man Bhind th Curtain in th real world.  No one I know in th real world has evr known about th JPS, and no one Ive met thru bloggin can idennify th MBC.  Viewing things in th small, that princippld separation has hinderd th growfe o th Show, ocourse -- so prevalent is th conception of blogging as netwerking.  But viewing things in th LARGE, it has payd invaluable dividends in th prsuit of TRUE PLAYRs.

But lets not make this TRIBUTE inta TOO much of a manifesto, kay?  What Im wantin to point out here is that, while my blogski may not a-been found by Piet, it was nonetheless found by my brothr.  Atlas Cerise is a Polanski Brothr.  Nfackt, I have no doubt that if Piet were today to take up bloggin, th Blood-Brothrs Polanski woud not be as good and as satisfying a two-man ackt as Atlanski has come to be.  And so, as I awready suggestd when I announcd my intention to end th JPS, a rich and rare creative collaboration like th one Ive establishd wif Atlas can continue, and probly shoud continue.  What I can now add definitively is that this partickular collaboration WILL continue.  Look for Atlanski to keep playin th gameski.

As Ive mentiond many times, Atlas (JediMacFan) was awready a reggalr comentr at Tetherd Cow when I stumbld upon it in late Novembr o 2005.  Im pretty sure that as my relations wit th Revrend startd warmin upski, I made a point o lookin at th blogs o some o th othr fokes playin there.  I remembr notin that Anne Arkhams blogski wudnt on Blogger, so I wudnt sure if Id be able to play there (cuz maybe Id be requird to leave a email address, which Joey dont DO).  Im pretty sure I also lookd at JediMacFans Old Fish and Lemonade, which was on Blogger back thenski; but I didnt post no comments or nothin.

Then, fairly early on in my scoutin o Tetherd Cow, aftr Id prvided th first coment on a post about Simple Graphics Man, JediMacFan postd a coment that addressd me by name, and supplyd what seemd rathr clearly to be a kind o cooprative shtick!  (You can see th exchange HERE.)  Since thats EXACKLY th kind o thing I always lookd for in th blogassfear, I soon thereaftr left my first coment at Old Fish and Lemonade.  ka-THUNKski!  Fell totaly FLATski.  Got no rsponse from th fuckr -- tho it WAS a dangd funny coment I left!  Much latr, aftr wed awready bcome a TEAMski, I razzd Atlas about him givin me th cold shouldr when I first stoppd by OFaL.  Youll notice, if you look at th postski1, that Atlas's eventual rsponse came YEARS aftr th initial coment -- and, ocourse, him & me had plenny o funski wit th whole thing aftr that!

But evn my SECKON coment at OFaL -- where I servd up a jokeski originaly offrd by Doc Murk -- was ALSO ignord by AtlasMacFan!  Th Revrend hadta come in and save th day wif a little bit o rsponsive shtick.  (Didnt I tell ya th Revrend always "got it"?)  It was beginnin to look like ol JediMac must notta realizd that I was th guy hed tryd shtickin wif ovr at th Cow.  Eithr that, or he dvelopd a baaaaad case o th stodgys.  In any case, it seemd clear Id misjudgd my man.

My third OFaL coment was also IGNORD.  Then -- at LONG last! -- th fuckr rsponded to a coment o mine!  And he rsponded wif shtick!  Grantd, I pracktickly FORCD im to play; but I probly wouda deemd him a lost cause if he had a-faild THAT testski.  Always one to play, I comentd a seckon time on th same postski -- and th end-rsult was a exchange that has come to be, in certain small circkles, a CLASSICK.  It went on like this fer a while -- me somtimes being ignord, and othr times gettin some decent play.  Then, on Christmas Day, th JPS got linkd in th OFaL sidebar.

JediMacFatlas startd playin th JPS stage when I publish a post that kinda sorta had sompm kinda sorta to say about kinda sorta maybe lusting aftr a cartoon high sckool chick.  THATs what brought him ovr (predicktably enough).  His refrence to anothr hot cartoon redhead promptd a refrence to his refrence in THIS postski, which was shortly aftr th JPS ended up linkd in th OFaL sidebar.

At this stage, I guess youd say me & Atlas had dvelopd a good bloggin relationship.  We read each othrs blogskis, comentd on em, did a little shtick togethr, and saw reasn to keep on doin it.  January 1, 2006 was probly when that relationship first startd bein special.  You fokes know Im talkin about th Inaugural Rasputin Poemin gig at TCA.  The Revrend publishd a post about Rasputins severd dickski, I postd a poemski, JediMac postd a poemski, JediMac postd anothr poemski, I postd anothr poemski, th Revrend threw up his hands in horror, I razzd him a bit, JediMac postd anothr poemski, Cissy postd a poemski, and it was pretty clear (evn suggestd by me) that this might be a annual January 1 thing at th Cow.  Throughout 2006 (in April o which OFaL got linkd at JPS), Im pretty sure there was th ockasional refrence to th Rasputin thing -- usualy by JediMac or by me -- and I think evn some explicit refrence to a repeat event on January 1, 2007.  And Im pretty sure there had been at least one similar raunchy poemin shoot-out ovr at TCA.  So when 2007 began, JediMacFan postd a Rasputin poemski on the old 2006 post, while I waitd for th Revrend to publish a January 1 post, and postd a Rasputin poemski there.  And thus began th seckon annual Rasputin Poemin gig.

Th result o this was not only that me & Atlas bgan seein ourselfs as birds-of-a-feathr, but also that othrs saw us as that.  We were, in evryones eyes, th "culprits" in that little bit o "vandalism."  We had a signature shtick, and we had our own friggin hollyday!  And we had a commitment to keepin fokes in th hollyday mood ovr th course of a whole friggin yearski!  Itd be years bfore th ackt got its name; but it quickly bcame pretty predicktable that Atlas poemin woud bring Polanski poemin, and Polanski poemin woud bring Atlas poemin.  Othr fokes evn bgan posting coments suggesting that wed end up poemin about th subjeckt o some postski.  Yep, fokes, a two-man ackt emergd, and emergd wif a rep!

Th next event in th emergence of Atlanski happmd in th early munts o 2008.  Late in 2007, fer reasns that are Atlas's to tell, JediMacFan put Old Fish and Lemonade on ice and opmd up a new blogski calld The Minstry of Dystopia.  This is when JediMacFan startd goin by th name 'Atlas Cerise'.  During a napski I took in th early munts o 2008, a numbr o changes took place in th Polanski Show community -- none of em good.  This was probly when a numbr o JPS playrs got corruptd and turnd inta boring-ass diary-bloggrs and netwerkrs.  In othr words, things went to shit in my absence.  When I awoke from my slumbr, Id found that among all othr th grotesque changes, The Ministry of Dystopia had been CLOSD!

Desprate situations call fer desprate measures, fokes; and so I took th measure o contackting Atlas (via th Revrend) and Atlas & me commencd a backchannel convrsation about th state o bloggin in our little community.  It was hardly suprising that we agreed on so much.  That backchannel chattr continues to th present day -- tho th Man Bhind th Curtain is STILL wholly bhind th curtain.  Th backchannel chattr, howevr, servd to strengthen th partnrship, and enabld us to coordinate and craft our shtick in th blogassfear a bit more.

It was back in February o this year that I made th decision to end th JPS at th end of its fifth year.  Shortly aftr I made that decision, and well before I announcd it here, I made a point o conveying th news to Atlas and th Revrend.  Until th decision was announced, ocourse, I always had th option o rethinking th decision; but aftr th announcment was made, there was no turnin back.

Atlas & me continued to converse thru backchannels. And in th course o that conversation he said sompm like, "I hope we can continue th poemski game aftr th JPS is closd" -- by which he meant continue it via th backchannels.  I had no intention o doin that -- hadnt evn thought o doin that, nfackt.  I made clear my reasns fer wantin to bring th Show to a end -- I wantd to channel th creative energy that went inta th Show into othr, non-Polanski projeckts.

Still, as I thought about his prposal, I thought, "Yes.  Th Atlanski poemski game DOES have a irreducible value; and there IS a energy that went inta it that CANNOT fruitfully be channeld inta anything elseski."  But I also thought that, IF we were gonna continue it, evn if only fer our own amusement, we ought at least to ALLOW othrs to peek at our prformance.

And so, as Ive awready suggestd in this post and in othrs, Atlanski will still be doin its thing in cybrspace.  We bofe know th game, we bofe know where th game plays, we bofe know who else GOTS game, and we bofe cherish prducktive partnrships.  That you fokes have stayd wit th Polanski Show long enough to be readin this penultimate postski encourages me that youre th type that will fervently search fer smiles and will continually find em.  Heres hopin at least some o them smiles come courtesy of Atlas and Polanski -- Atlanski!

1 If yer wondrin about th DATE / TIME stamps, which make it look like my coment at OFaL was postd bfore Atlas's rsponse to me at TCA, remembr that TCA time (Eastrn Australier) is probly about 18 hours ahead o OFaL time (USA Eastrn Time).

Ah ... Genyus!  Thy Name is G.E.!


At a meeting in the forties Paul Tillich undertook to expound his views on the Absolute and "the ground of being."  It happened that G.E. Moore was in the group that evening, and everyone looked forward with great interest to what Moore would say.  When his time came, there was an ominous pause, and then Moore broke out, "I am sorry to say that there is not a single sentence in Professor Tillich's paper, not a single sentence, that I have been able to understand.  Would Professor Tillich give me one proposition that he thinks I might be able to understand?"  As I recall, Tillich was too dumbfounded to reply.  It was the most direct confrontation I have known between German speculation and British analysis.

-- Brand Blanshard, "Autobiography"
The Philosophy of Brand Blanshard

Im pretty confident that MY philosophickle genyus will be reckonizd, once fokes realize how dangd much shit I cmpletely dont undrstand.

TRIBUTE -- Anaglyph


I wondr ...  Is there really any need fer me to write a post payin TRIBUTE to th Revrend Anaglyph and Tetherd Cow Ahead?  Has he not awready been mentiond in just about evry TRIBUTE post Ive writtn thus far?  More importntly, has any blogski been mentiond and / or linkd here at JPS more than his?   Has any bloggr left a more discernible stamp on th bloggin here at th Show than he has?

No and NOski.  The Joey Polanski Show has in effeckt incorporatd a overt & ongoing tribute to bofe bloggr and blogski since th links were first establishd back in early Decembr 2005.  Th TCA link in th JPS sidebar was probly added below eight othr linkskis; but it has now fer years been unshakably atop th list.  Indeedski, of th 30 or so sites that were evr at one time or anothr linkd here at th JPS (yes, fokes, there HAVE been about that many), Tetherd Cow Ahead is th only one that can boast BOFE original & engaging content AND a seemingly endless supply o enthusiasm & energy.  Association wif TCA has been nothin short of a game-changr in Polanski Show histry; and I am so glad that that association began so early in my bloggin career.

But this final run o TRIBUTE postskis just woudnt be complete wifout one more focusd discussion o th part TCA and th Revrend have playd in Polanski Show histry and the place they bofe will always ockupy in my sappy Polack heart.  So lets do it.

I know Ive come close to sayin it this bluntly in th pastski, but probly still aint realy gone ahead & done it yet.  Tetherd Cow Ahead is th bestest blogski I evr playd at -- bar none.  It blends th comedick wit th critickle, th sarcastick wit th sentimental.  Its always original, prsonal, engaging, and inviting.  And, as youd expeckt, its as much about th bloggr as it is about th blogski.  Th Revrend woud still have a fine site and a popular one evn if he simply servd as th craftsman and nevr came out & mixd it up wif his comentrs.  Th Revrend, however, has that sense o play that distinguishs th great from th merely good enough.

And I gotta add here that, so far as I can tell (not bein able litraly to get inside anyone elses headski), th Revrend is probly one o only two JPS playrs (th othr bein Tomski) who seem to have "got" th Polanski Show from th very first exposure to it.  Oviously, th shtick aint evryones cup o teaski; but I been long convincd that many fokes coudnt stomach it eithr bcause they initialy coudnt sense that it was shtick or else bcause they coudnt evr undrstand th rationale bhind th shtick.  Well, th Revrend seemd to sense th shtick AND undrstand, at least vaguely, what it was all about; and I think its probly werf considring th relation btween Polanski Show shtick and th significkant bond btween JPS and th Revrend.

See, fer those few o yous who dont know it, th Revrend is a exspurt in sound.  He works as a sound designr & editr in filmskis.  (Nfackt, th reasn hes missin a good bit o these TRIBUTEs is cuz hes wingin his way to Los Angeles to do his thing on some pitchr.)  He is also a musickle composr and artist.  So he has bofe a sense AND a know-how when it somes to sound.

Bloggin, howevr, is largely about th writtn word.  So itd be very easy to conclude that theres very little about bloggin that has anything to do wif sound.  Oh, sure, a bloggr coud embed one o them dopey little musick-playrs that starts playin some annoying bit a crapski th moment you visit th blogski, whethr you want it to or notski; but them things aint really part o th essence o bloggin.  Rathr, theyre just ornamentardal doodads that a bloggr might use to covr up th fackt that he gots nothin werfwhile to write on his blogski.  No.  Th essence o blogging is writtn content.

But woudnt it be a mistake, fokes, to think that writtn content gots nothin to do wif soundski?  Dangd straight, it woud!  Writtn words are meant to be read; and readin words always conjures up to some dgree th sound o them words as spokn.

Now, woud it come as a suprise to yous if I toldjas that th secret to undrstanding The Joey Polanski Show is ALL about sound?  Yep, when you read sompm in Polanskiese, I long ago told a comentr who seemd not to get th shtick at first, youre spposta be hearin a distincktive voice inside yer headski!  If you aint th type who tends to associate th writtn word wif sound, then youll nevr appreciate eithr Polanskiese OR th POEMSKI game!  Aint poetry, whethr writtn or recitd, ALL about soundski?  Now are you hoopleheads startin to fuckin GET IT?

Th Revrend fuckin gets it!  Th Revrend always fuckin gets it.  Th Revrend fuckin got it from th fuckin git-go!  And hows come Im talkin like Swedgin all of a suddn?  Oh, yeah ... Cuz its ALL about th SOUNDski!

I found Tetherd Cow Ahead back when it was a Blogger blog.  Its title came up on th rolling list that usta appear on th Blogger sign-in page.  I noticd th Polanskiese spelling of 'tetherd', and I also thought that a blog title referring to a COW was oddly amusive.  My first visit took me to THIS post, where I left my first TCA coment.  I was happy to see that Anaglyph responded in a playful way.  I was evn happyer when he postd his first coment at JPS.  And it was just a few days latr that th Rev, replyin to a coment I left at th Cow, showd me that he GOT TH SHTICK.  Lickety-splitski, I linkd him, he linkd me, and th rest, as they say, is HISTRY!

A early part o that histry involvd my lookin back at some o th earlyer posts at TCA and finding THIS post, which introducd facitiously th idea that Anaglyph was to be calld 'Reverend'.  I thought that was great shtick, and so when I startd respondin to his coments at JPS, and when I intrduced him to JPS readrs, I included th title.  And I did it rathr consistently, which Id venture to say is what eventualy resultd in just about EVRYONE addressin him as "Reverend."

A latr bit o that histry had th Revrend publishing THIS postski, about making a homunckulus.  I dont need to tell yas that that led to lotsa good shtick here at th Polanski Show.

And ocourse there are so many othr running gags that have grown up among those o us who play reggalrly at th Cow -- (1) quack-echos, (2) the Unusual Thing, (3) Simple Graphics Man, (4) Sister Veronica, (5) Moo Medals, (6) Gilbert Einstein, (7) Red or Purple, (8) Sir Joey, (9) Pocket Jesus, (10) rottn turnips, (11) Joey's Shelf, and -- th most famous of all -- (12) Rasputin Dick Poetry!

And lastly Ill mention some o th most engaging and enjoyable little riffing opportunitys.

  1. Cow Captions (Billy!)
  2. Shepherd Captions
  3. Crossboot Filmskis
  4. Not-News Headlines (close to 475 coments, last I lookd)
  5. Text Messages from Histry
When I announcd that Id be shuttin down th Show, I mentiond that I felt very strongly about maintaining th fruitful collaborative relationships Ive establishd wif othr bloggrs, and also that future collaborative projeckts wit them othr bloggrs was NOT ruld out by th ending o th Show.  It shoud be pretty clear that I aint inclind to kick th Cow to th curbski.  There's too much life, too much GAME there fer me to stay off that stage.  Plus, ocourse, I feel I gotta keep shouldring my share o th responsibility fer creatin th annual Rasputin thingy.  So, while there wont be a JPS stage fer us all to play on togethr, expeckt to see me now & again where th Tetherd Cow roams.

Monday, July 12, 2010

... where our motto is ...


"Fokes wont blieve it aint neon!"



Now we get to th TRIBUTE posts that I awready knew woud be th hardest ones to write.  Theres a sense in which The Joey Polanski Show has been craftd to be a ongoing tribute to the TRUE PRFORMER.  And th final three bloggrs I wanna play tribute to are that & more to me.  Links to their blogskis remain in th very short links-list in th JPS sidebar, and will be there when th JPS bcomes part o th blogassfears petrifyd forest.  All three o these guys undoubtdly GET IT; and evry one ubms undeniably GOT IT.

Lets start wif Mike.

Its especialy hard to write a post payin tribute to Mike, bcause Mike has had two seprate careers as a Polanski Show playr -- one as th ownr o Gin & Tonic (long ago removd from cybrspace), and one as th ownr o Tongue In Check.  Ya might evn say that hes had two & a haff such careers, since Tongue In Check, fer a time, was bein run ovr on WordPress.  Heck, I sppose you coud evn say that Mikes had two & two haffs a career as a JPS associate, since he also runs Myth vs. Reality (along wif Pole-pal, Atlas Cerise), which is also linkd in th sidebar.  Wif so many "firsts" & "lasts" to chronickle, maybe that aint th best kinda tribute post to writeski.

But certainly th story o my association wif Mike & his bloggin endeavrs is a story werf tellin.  Ive said many times that it was thru my early association wit th Revrend Anaglyph and Tetherd Cow Ahead that I came to meet th vast majority o th bloggrs who woud eventualy come to be JPS associates.  Ive also mentiond, tho probly less oftn, that th vast majority o THAT vast majority woud become JPS-afiliatd thru my association wif Mike.  See, I met th Revrend in th course o my own blog-surfin.  And through th Revrend I met Chickie (among othrs), and thru Chickie I met Mike.  Thru Mike, I met Colonel Colonel, Sara Sue, Phoebe Fay, Here Today / Gone Tomorrow, Joseph, and maybe some othrs whove so long ago falln off th Polanski Show radar that I cant easily remembr em.  Colonel Colonel, ocourse, was once a spiritd poemr, and Sara Sue was quite th hootski in her JPS days.  So my association wif Mike helpd to keep my joint jumpin throughout them halcyon years, 2006 & 2007.

But, in retrospeckt, my relationship wif Mike seems sorta like one o them storys about two marryd people who share one o th greatest loves o all time -- cept, unfortunately, they aint marryd to each othr.  Its th kinda story that leaves ya wondring what MIGHTA been, if only them two star-crossd lovrs had met each othr bfore they awready got tied down to them othr fokes.

Puttin it bluntly, there always seemd sompm genraly unhealfy, from a Polanski prspecktive, in th atmosphere at Mikes places.  Th crowd that grew up around G&T and TIC seemd like anything but Polanski Show material.  And nfackt, a few old Polanski Show playrs who eventualy establishd ties wif Mike shortly thereaftr stoppd bein very dependable in their formr capacity.  In short, while The Joey Polanski Show is powerd by th idea that blogging is prformance, th prevailing idea among th run-o-th-mill "Tongue-In-Check-ers" seemd to portray bloggin as netwerkin.  I not only woudnt, but couldnt fit in wit that crowd; and it was a bit disheartning to see some fokes who probly wouda baggd bloggin back in '05 but fer me rathr cheerfully transform emselfs from prformers into netwerkrs.  (A pox on their friggin hausfraus!)

I mention all this bcause it makes it all th more significkant that I place on my creative partnrship wif Mike th high value that I do.  Id suspecktd since early on, but have since come to know, that although Mike can certainly play (and play very well) to that othr kind o crowd, he was nevr wholly of that crowd.  Im as convincd as I can be that Mike is, and always will be, a TRUE PLAYR.

Im pretty sure I knew of Mike bfore eithr o us evr startd visitin each othrs blogskis.  But I cant remembr -- and Gin & Tonic aint around no more for PSI to consult -- which of us was th first to visit th othr.  Were I to go wif my vague recollecktion, Id say that his first visit to JPS preceded my first visit to G&T.  What I do recall quite clearly is how natural th playful exchanges tween Mike and me felt, bofe at JPS and at G&T.  About a munth aftr Mikes first apearance on th Polanski Show stage, Gin & Tonic got a link in th JPS sidebar.

Its hard to believe that it was only about two munts latr that G&T disapeard.  Twas hard to believe bcause I remembr havin so MUCH fun there.  Nfackt, th few o us who remembr th G&T days will nevr ferget th post emphasizing what I guess wed call th European prnunciation of 'macaque' -- a post which spawnd a whole host o coments, on that and on subsequent posts, in which we ran that gag fer all it was werf.  Th ockasional 'macaque' refrence has been made at Tongue In Check ovr th years, but theres almost been a kind o unspoken reckonition that that ol gag was best retird outta respeckt fer th legendary Gin & Tonic.

And just as it seems in my memry that G&T must have lastd beyond June of '06, so it also seems that Tongue In Check coud not have been startd THAT long ago.  But as a mattr o fackt, TIC did begin only days aftr Id noticd th disapearance of Gin & Tonic.

I dont know how soon it was aftr this that I became aware of TIC, but I do remembr that once I discoverd it, I put Mike in th JPS doghouse.  I now regret havin done that, and I here offr Mike my apology.  At th time, I interpretd it all as one o them faux retirements -- baggin a establishd blog on sompm of a whimski, and then startin up a new one and tryin to reclaim all o th old readrs o th old blogski.  And altho nothin was said about any o this, I kinda suspeckt that Mike caught my vibe, and he & I steerd clear o one anothr fer a while.  Not too long aftr, I came to learn th story bhind th end o G&T and th start o TIC.  It hadta do wif fokes Mike knows and hasta deal wif in th real world discoverin G&T, and some negative consequences o that discovery.  As somone whos always takn pains to keep his real life from his bloggin life wholly separatd, I certainly undrstood Mikes move as well as anyone coud.  My recollecktion is that our estrangment lastd quite a while; but about haff a year latr, in th first munth o 2007, TIC got linkd in th JPS sidebar.  Mike was outta th doghouse, and th smiles resumd.

Well, as we all got a bit long in th toof, and TIC went thru its 17-munth WordPress phase, and places to play were eithr bein convertd to diary-blogs or surrenderd to Chinkbots, it bcame clear to me, and Im sure to some othrs, that them halcyon days belongd to th ages.  Posting here at JPS slowd to a crawl, naps being almost as long and as frequent as they coud be wifout dstroying th continuity o th munthly arckive.  Relations among some o us startd to seem, not exackly straind, but prhaps a bit loose.  There was, on my part, a conscious retreat inta a kind o bloggin that was dliberately suitd to th tastes o th few who had, ovr th many years, stayd true to th same ideal as th one thats always powerd th Polanski Show.  It was during this relatively dead period that I touchd base wif Mike, via backchannel chattr, about th state o bloggin and th state o our relationship.  This chattr is what convincd me finaly that Mike was stand-up.  We reach.

Yep, we reach.  We reach, but we are OLD.  Old & tired.  Its gettin to be where Jackin off is all some o us evr think of anymore.  I announcd th start o th Polanski Shows stretch-run just a bit bfore St. Paddys Day; and in a recent coment at JPS, Mike has made it more or less clear that he dont foresee a return to th glory days ovr at Tongue In Check.  Its all sad, ocourse, to those o us who recall th middle years o th last haff-deckade; but its prhaps unavoidable.  Still to be standing, and tryin to be true to th ideal, is itself a accomplishment -- especialy when contrastd wif all em who were GONE-zo aftr only a coupla yearskis, and all em fer whom "original content" (to use th expression o JPS heroine, Anne Arkham) means nothin but diary-ya.  Aftr The Joey Polanski Show goes stiffski -- (It happms TMORRO, fokes!) -- I will continue to be intrestd in evn th little bit o bloggin that Mike expeckts to do in th future.

In closing, Id like to give a shout out to th Queen o Poland (Mrs Mike, who reportdly digs th Polanski Show), and to Carmen, and the Boy, and Jackie -- Mikes kin.  I consider em all palskis, as I considr Mike th same.  Th tribute, ocourse, continues, wit th preservd links to Tongue In Check and Myth vs. Reality in the sidebar; but lemme conclude this FOCAL piece o that TRIBUTE wif some linkskis to some fun times I had at TIC.

  1. A First Poemski: It took a while fer me to get around to postin a poemski ovr at Mikes.  HERE youll find th first.
  2. Mike On a Plane: If theres a post Id idennify as th TIC countrpart o th 'Macaque' post ovr at G&T, itd be THISn.  Ive made a point of linkin to it more than once since it was publishd.
  3. Atmikelanski: More poemin got Mike into th Atlanski game in a BIG way.
  4. Chillin Wif Friends: Poemin at Mikes began to feel quite natural.
  5. Some Final Poemskis: Just bfore TIC returnd to Blogger from WordPress, I postd a couple more poemskis on THIS POSTski.

writ poemski


In my previos postski -- my TRIBUTE to Anne Arkham -- I mentiond the official Polanski Show notebook.  When I first got a digital camra a coupla years ago, I plannd to work up a postski thatd show ya some things backstage at th JPS -- includin th notebook.  Well, I guess th thought o setting up a photoshoot of a bunch o inanimate objeckts sittin on a desk musta, like, bored th shit outta me, cuz I nevr got aroun to takin alla th pitchrs that I envisiond woud go inta that postski.  And now that th end o th show is nigh, there just aint enough time to work th dangd thing up.

But I can post th notebook pitchr I plannd to incklude.  It shows part o th page on which I wrote a Rasputin poemski durin RIPE III.

Clickski fer BIGski

This poemski was eventually postd as coment #33.  You can see that I had th main punchline awready writtn bfore crafting th ovrall poemski.  Twards th top o th pitchr, you can see part o th poemski that was eventually postd as coment #24.  Th handwriting suggests I was pretty drunkski when I did th writing; but its hard fer me to remembr now -- which is a pretty sure sign that I probly was.

TRIBUTE -- Anne Arkham


If Anne Arkham currrently has a blogski -- othr than THISn, I mean -- then I dont know about it.  Her blogski from back in th day when she was a Polanski Show playr -- Anne Arkham: Art. Humor. Larceny. -- disappeared from cybrspace quite a while ago.  Nfackt, Im pretty sure AAAHL went Full Nicholson only about eight munts aftr Annes first association wit The Joey Polanski Show.  Thus, most o AAAHLs 18-munth run was awready in th arckives when we at th JPS first met Anne.  Yet Anne Arkham is undeniably a figgr from th JPS heyday.  Her blogski, dspite bein long gone, and her play on th JPS stage, tho long ago ended, I will long remembr strongly and fondly.

Since Annes blogski is no longr viewable, there wont be no pitchrs o Anne in this postski.  Nstead, Ill use some pitchrs thatll sorta help to tell ya some o th things I remembr about Anneski.

Anne livd in Chicaaaago.

Anne probly slept in Chicaaaago too.

Sevral times in th past, I mentiond that Anne is among them whose JPS association can be traced to our meetin up wit th Revrend Anaglyph.  Shortly aftr I intrducd a sidebar link to his blogski, Tetherd Cow Ahead, which link remains securely at th top o th evr-shrinking links-listski, th Revrend went & done sompm that very few JPS afiliates have evr done.  He publishd a post givin th JPS a pretty fine send-up.  Altho that post was publishd in early Decembr o 2005, it containd a link to a JPS post from about a munth and a haff earlyer; and so its on THAT post that we find Anne's first appearance on th Polanski Show stage.

Annes initial play at th Polanski Show was so uncommonly delightful that she quickly helpd prduce one o th few coments-secktions here at JPS that seemd to me so comedickly prfeckt that I atchualy closd th coments-sections to keep em from havin their prfecktion destroyd.  Aint suprising, aftr so early an accomplishment, that Annes blogski got a sidebar linkski shortly thereaftr.  And Anne prfecktd a JPS coments-secktion not just that one time, but also a seckon time some three munts latr.  In th short time she playd wif us, she had a sneaky way o makin some BIG plays!

Anne had a polydactyl cat namd Butkus
(not pitchrd)

When Anne went walkin, her Bud was a sight to see
(neithr walkr nor pooch pitchrd)

Anne Arkham: Art. Humor. Larceny was started, as I recall, right around th same time as Doc Murk's Murk's World, Tomskis Party Vikings -- Tommy's True Tales, and (as it happms) th Revrends Tetherd Cow Ahead.  That was in January o 2005 -- six or sevn munts bfore I startd bloggin.  But I was so takn wif Annes wit that I done sompm that I only done wif one othr blog (i.e., Tomskis) -- I began readin its arckive from th beginning.  And I gotta tell ya, fokes, this only increasd my admiration fer Anneski.

See, by th time I startd playin at Annes place, she was awready quite accomplishd as a bloggr.  Her blogski had a enormous following (judgin by th numbr o reggalr comentrs), and her posts exibitd a characktristic zing.  She had, some woud say, a distincktive "voice."  What I learnd by readin Annes arckive is that good bloggrs aint necesarily born good bloggrs.  And becomin a good bloggr might atchualy take a lil bit o thinkin and a good bit o doin.

Specifickly, I remembr a early post o Annes where she basickly said sompm like, "Now that I gots a blogski, Im gonna hafta look at a few blogskis and see what it is that othr fokes do wit theirs."  And, aftr a bit o explorin & experimentin, she publishd a post (on May 4, 2005) calld "How To Blog," in which she shared her thoughts on what does & what does NOT make fer good bloggin.  (This post, I believe, was among th posts that were quick-linkd in her sidebar, by th time I startd visiting.)

Throughout th five-year run o The Joey Polanski Show, Ive jottd Show-relatd stuff into a notebook -- ideas fer posts, web addresses, tecknickle info, etc. -- and while I was readin Annes arckive, I was, ocourse, takin noteskis.  Thats how I know that "How To Blog" was publishd on May 4, 2005.  I wrote it downski.  And sompm Anne said in that postski -- one of her "DONTs" -- I thought was SPOT ON, especialy as it expressd sompm Ive believd about good bloggin from th time I startd.  I wrote that down tooski.  And so what follows, fokes, may be th only survivin verbatim bit o wisdom from Anne Arkham: Art. Humor. Larceny.
Don't be a link whore.  Do put in some links to the things that interest you, but your original content is what will bring people back.

-- Anne Arkham
"How To Blog"
May 4, 2005

Surely th blogassfear woud be tons bettr if there was just one less link whore in our midst, dontcha agree?

Th notes I jottd down include titles o some othr posts Anne wrote -- like "Toads and Karma" and "How To Bribe a Judge" -- but I also remembr some posts wifout havin to consult my notebook.  I remembr a post about stealing a Picasso from a office reception area, and a post about droppin doggy doo in a banks night-dposit boxski.  Oh, yeah ...  And Scripture Mints ...  I remembr Scripture Mints.

But why do I always think of Anne whenevr th subjeckt o Linear Algebra comes upski?  Hmmm ...

Since she stoppd updatin her blogski, and evn since her blogski disappeard from cybrspace, Anne has two or three timeskis stoppd by th Polanski Show -- sompm which has made me happy -- but Im pretty sure her last bit o reggalr play was her rathr frisky coment on THIS POST.  As a rathr pleasant suprise, she postd a poemski to kick off RIPE IV; and my undrstanding, from readin Tetherd Cow, is that she stays in touch wit th Revrend.  I also recall erstwhile JPS associate, Casey, passin on a bit o happy news about Anne.  Twas nothin specifick, but to th genral effeckt that shes doin okay.  Thats goodski.

And so, as I prepare to leave th Polanski Show stage, I take a figgrative glance tward Chicaaaago, and send a warm thought Annes way.  Durin th short time she graced th same stage, she shone about as brightly as any o us evr does.  Fare thee well, lass.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

meet market


Its hardly suprising, I guess, that wherevr you find HO NEGGERS ...

... youll be sure to find Layers.

-- Pimp Polanski

Saturday, July 10, 2010

TRIBUTE -- Cissy Strutt


Having paid tribute to two of th earlyest Polanski Show playrs -- Doc Murk and Tomski -- I want next to pay tribute to some bloggrs who became very important playrs during what I think in retrospeckt can be idennifyd as th heyday o th JPS.  Each o these has, in a special way, enhancd bofe th Show and my ovrall bloggin experience.

Lets start wif Cissy Strutt.

To my knowledge, Cissy Strutt nevr had a blogski until about a year and a haff aftr th Polanski Show was startd.  Yet she was awready a familyar figgr to me when, aftr starting her first blogski, Ginger Stick, she first showd up on th JPS stage.1  How was it that she was awready familyar?  Well, ocourse, she is a real-world pal o th Revrend Anaglyph, and had been commenting at Tetherd Cow Ahead since a good five munts bfore I evr startd bloggin.  Nfackt, a good year bfore she startd Ginger Stick, shed awready made a name fer herself by participatin in th first Rasputin International Poetry Exhibition (a.k.a. The Annual Rasputin Pickled Penis Poetry Contest).

As th poemski game was pretty well establishd by th time Ciss made her first JPS appearance (th seckon RIPE event havin just concluded), I was, ocourse, glad to see her start playin th Polanski Show stage reggalrly.  About two munts latr2, I made my first appearance at Ginger Stick, and my first appearance at Blue Flyer, Cissys book blogski.  About three munts aftr Cissys JPS debut, I added seprate sidebar links to bofe Ginger Stick and Blue Flyer; but a coupla munts bfore that3, Id awready added a sidebar link to Cissys Blogger profile, as a kind o gateway to bofe blogskis.

Blue Flyer didnt last much more than a haff a year, and so that linkski came down a good while backski.  But th link to Ginger Stick was one o th last ones to go in th gradual paring o th JPS links-listski.  Thats bcause Ginger Stick, up until it went Full Nicholson this past January, was to my mind one o th few reliably fun places to play in th blogassfear.  And if you wanna know WHY it was so reliably fun, I can say that it was far more about th bloggr than it was about th blog -- which is why Im paying tribute here to Cissy Strutt.

In th abstrackt, a photo blog aint th sorta place where I typickly like to do my thing.  And that, ocourse, is cuz th typickle photo bloggr aint especialy receptive to shtick.  If ya aint ooh-in and ahh-in ovr th photos, you aint welckome, usualy.  But Cissy had that kind of wit that can handle subtle and sophisticatd humor as well as th ribald and th raunchy.  She was funny and flirtatious, and dependable.  She was alla th things that have tended to make th long-time Tetherd Cow reggalrs such good Polanski Show playrs.

And a good bit o th fun I had at Ginger Stick was, ocourse, poemin fun; and so, to chronickle some o them good times I had at Cissys, lemme jus direckt ya to Poemski: The Polanski Catalog -- especially Volumes III, IV, and V.

I dont know why Cissy seems to have revertd back to her earlyer years o bein more or less exclusively a Tetherd Cow playr.  I miss her being in th poemin mix, here at JPS and elsewhere.

But it has been five years, and few o th old timrs are still bloggin hot.  And, as evn th Polanski Show is in its final dayskis, now aint th time fer judgments & lamentations.  Nows th time fer cherishing memrys.  And I gots a whirl o memrys o Cissy Strutt that I truly cherish.

I wish her wellski.

1 Cissys coment here shows up as Anonymous in spite o th fackt that she postd th coment usin her reggalr Blogger idennity.  Th reasn th coment has been "anonymizd," near as I can tellski, is that this was right aroun th time that I was more or less forcd to switch ovr from Old Blogger to New Blogger.  This switch seemd to anonymize some o th most recently postd coments.

2 When Ciss first showd up at th JPS, I remaind fer a while undr th impression that she had no blogskis.  Thats hows come it took me so long to pay her blogskis a visit.

3 Twas around th time I first learnd o her blogskis.



A buck buys a lot more than ya might thinkski.

Friday, July 09, 2010

TRIBUTE -- Tom Serafini, Actor to the Stars!


Appropriately, th seckon bloggr I wanna pay tribute to, in this stretch-run o th Show, is th fella who bcame th seckon Polanski Show playr.  That, ocourse, woud be Tom Serafini, Actor to the Stars -- known affecktionately as "Tomski," here in Polanski circkles.

Like Doc Murk, th first o th Polanski Show playrs, Tomski started his blogski, Party Vikings -- Tommy's True Tales, ovr haff a year bfore th Polanski Show was startd; and, sadly, he long ago distancd imself from th Show, and his blogski is now pretty much fully Jackd.  But Tomski will always ockupy -- in memry and in fackt -- a very special place in JPS histry.

Altho Doc Murk preceded im inta th troupe, Tomski was th first Polanski Show playr who seemd sorta like ... well ... sorta like kin.  Doc Murk, when I found im, was awready thoroughly immersd in a sizable clan o real-world pals, many o whom had their own blogskis; and th Docs play on th JPS stage always seemd decidedly seckondary.  By contrast, th real-world pals that were comenting on Tomskis blogski tended not to be bloggrs emselfs; and so Tomski seemd genuinely glad to find anothr bloggr to play wif.

Tomski quickly bcame a pal o th Pole -- more or less a JPS insidr.  In effeckt, Tomski bcame sompm of a partnr in th very new projeckt o blog-building that Id takn up.  As th troupe soon expanded to include a handful o playrs, it was always clear that Tomski was th first among equals.  He was th best, th most natural, o th Polanski Show playrs.

In th Murk TRIBUTE and elsewhere, I sorta mentiond that my blog-building efferts have always been conditiond by a principple that if ya prduce a realy werfwhile blogski, any realy werfwhile bloggrs who find it will surely come by and play bcause thats what its in em to do.  True playrs simply cant resist comin to play, if only they see you bringin a little game their way.  Thus, snagging a true playr was nevr to be done by spamming, by coaxing, or by cajoling.  Eschewin what Ive calld "cheap ottamaticks," my approach to blog-building was intentionaly made challenging -- and frustrating, as it turns out -- but it also servd as a most effective way to separate those who GET IT from those who DONT.

Aftr two munts o bloggin, and seein how evn th membrs o Doc Murks clan were wholly resistant to my subtle efferts to get some PLAY out of em, I hadnt high hopes fer a positive rsponse when th rolling list o blog-titles on Blogger's sign-in page led me to visit & post a coment at Party Vikings.  I was ecstatick when my first coment at Tomskis place was promply followd by his first coment at mine.

Im convincd, howevr, that it was my seckon comment ovr there that truly establishd th Serafini - Polanski alliance.  Our shared intrest in classick TV comedy and classick cinematick horror, and our shared love of PLAY, were th unmistakable signs of our birdsofafeatherishness.

Chef o th Future -- Hah-haaaaa!

It wudnt long bfore his blogski was linkd at mine, and mine at his.

Shortly thereaftr, I was inspird by this bond -- and by th reggalr and rollicking play that ensued at bofe JPS and Party Vikings -- to go back and read virtualy all o th posts Tomski had previosly publishd.  This was quite a pleasant experience.  I learnd quite a bit about my new bloggin buddy and his blogski, saw its evolution from what it had been to what it had bcome, and saw th emergence of a rathr talentd tale-tellr.  Since I suspeckt few o you (if any) are familyer wif Tommy's True Tales, and since th Party Vikings arckive still exists intackt, lemme fill ya in on a some o what I learnd.

As th inaugral post indickates, Party Vikings was begun fer th purpose o chronickling th rise o Tom Serafini as a profesional acktr & comedian.  And yet it is equaly clear from that same post that th blogski was also intended -- albeit only incidently -- as a vehickle fer showcasing th Serafini witski.  It was not long at all bfore th seckon o these purposes became co-equal wit th first.  While th 2nd, 3rd, & 4th posts all concernd a stand-up gig, th 5th post passd from a discussion o th gig to a unrelatd rant about fokes who spell like shit.  (Crappy spellin is sompm Tomski woud come to love only latr.)  Th 6th post, postd less than 10 days inta th existence o Party Vikings, saw th emergence o th classick Serafini style.  The blogski was no longr merely a chronickle: it had become art.

Th 7th post, posted still bfore th blogski was 10 days old, set out to explain th meanin o th title, Party Vikings.  "Party Vikings" is how a teenagd Tomski and his pals thought of emselfs: youths possessd of a dream, prepard to plundr & pillage and seize what is desired, by sheer powr o prsonality, force o will, and sense o destiny.  We learn there that th true significkance o bein a Party Viking has always been relative to th prsonal quest o th individual.  In genral, its all about takin th werld by storm.  Fer Tomski in prtickular, back in em teenage years it had a little to do wif playin musick & followin film, and rathr a lot to do wif gettin his dick wet.

Adulthood found a more focusd & less predatory Party Viking, as Tomski was joind in his prfessional quest by his bettr haff, Tracy -- known alternatively as "Mrs. Viking," "Trace," "TheBrain," and "The Trage" ('Trage' bein th combination o 'T' + 'rage').  This pairing furthr illustrates th take-th-werld-by-storm flossifie o th Party Vikings, as Tomski clearly skippd marryin a ratbag & went straight fer th trophy-wife th firs time -- as if e friggin dservd it.


But in th life o Tom Serafini, th Trage has provd to be more than just eye-candy.  She servd as Tomski's managr when Tomski assumd th style & title of Dicky Balls, and assaultd th stand-up comedy stage.

Dicky Balls, goin fer th GOLD

Totly gratuitous pitchr o Rupert Pupkin

Moreovr, th Trage is also quite th wit in her own right -- at least as long as she has Tomski aroun to do some realy dumb shit.  And she evn helpd to strengthn th Serafini - Polanski alliance by posting coments here at th Polanski Show now and again.

But th point werf noting in alla this -- at least fer purposes o th present tribute -- is how early it was in Tomskis bloggin career that his blog began its transformation from a career-update vehickle to a forum for comedick crafting.  That process probly began about two weeks in, but startd becomin evident aftr a coupla munts.  And while there were a good numbr o career-orientd posts in th munts leadin up to th Tomski - Polanski collision -- like, fer instance, th series o posts dockumenting Tomskis prsuit of a gig as th Caped Crusader (starting here and ending, in tragicomedick fashion, here) -- it was also quite clear that th blog itself had by this time become one of Tomskis prformances.

As th exigencys o life began demanding more paying gigs, Tomski startd helpin out his pal, Johnny Style, in this or that new venture in renovation and / or installation.  These episodes prvided th material fer some o th classick True Tommy Tales.  As I devourd th Party Vikings arckive, I think it was what I like to call th WEGOTWATER post that stuck in my mind as th paradigmatick Serafini saga.  And there were many more such sagas to come.

I dont know exackly why Tomski eventualy driftd away from th JPS community.  Maybe its bcause th community became very large very fast and very soon after Tomski joind th troupe.  HissyFitz and Little Noodle rounded out a nice little band; and fokes like Hobbs von Wackamole and Geritopia woud soon be added, wif AngryMan, Salbert, and C.Rag waitin in th wingskis.  But when th JPS made contackt wit th Revrend Anaglyph and Tetherd Cow Ahead -- just about two munts aftr that little band was formd -- thats when th band o JPS playrs realy bcame sompm of a full-blown orckestra.  Ultimately through my association wif TCA, I made th acquaintance of such eventual JPS playrs as Anne Arkham, Chickie, JediMacFan / Atlas Cerise, Cissy Strutt, Mike, Casey, Colonel Colonel, Phoebe Fay, Sara Sue, Sirdar, Here Today / Gone Tomorrow, and probly a few othrs Im fergettin.  Prhaps this rapid expansion coud only result in a loss o intimacy, a partitioning o th troupe; and maybe sompm like a prceived loss o innocence somhow took a bit o th fun outta th ol gameski.  But whatevr be th reasn for his leaving us, I've always missd Tomski and Trage, and the ovious spirit o fun they brought to th Polanski Show stage.

And so, as we are now less than a handful o days away from th dropping o th final curtain, I am happy to pay tribute to a wit and a wag aftr my own heartski -- Tom Serafini, Actor to the Stars!

Tommy Triumphant

Thursday, July 08, 2010

Please dont confuse em!


Heres a pitchr o Sambo.

Heres anothr pitchr o Sambo.

Monday, July 05, 2010

You and Your Homunckulette (a Exspurts Guide)


If you do not hold on to your homunckulette wif two hands ...

... a good stiff breeze through a open window may leave you wishin you had.